i love sleeping...
It's the only time I float in nothingness...
No sadness to consume me...
No happiness to overwhelm me...
No fears to overcome...
No norms to conform to...
A place where time is but a concept.
Reality is bent.
And will is just waiting to happen.
A place where everything is twisted.
And I'm okay with that.
August 21, 2007
Know what you like... :)
I LIKE...
i like silence. Enough to figure things out.
i like soft music. Soft enough to fall asleep.
i like sleeping. Couldn't get enough of it.
i like dreaming. Hate waking up and finding out-it's just s dream.
i like laughter. How i wish I could laugh all day.
i like having good conversation. Hate being with someone boring.
i like singing. Hate my twisted voice.
i like dancing. Hate body pains after.
i like eating. My body is too busy getting fats.
i like rain. It cleanses everything.
i like summer. Summer is fun though it triggers my asthma.
i like jokes. Have a good sense of humor.
i like rainbows. It never fails to cheer me up.
i like butterflies. I envy them.
i like puppies. They loved to be cuddled.
i like writing. It helps me with my emotions.
i like crying for no reasons at all. It makes my heart feel light.
i like pink. Next to purple and green.
i like being matured. Because it seldom happens.
i like reading. It always teaches something.
i like being in love. It makes the world go around.
i like being happy. It make the world brighter.
i like living life. And enjoys the twist and turns of it.
i like silence. Enough to figure things out.
i like soft music. Soft enough to fall asleep.
i like sleeping. Couldn't get enough of it.
i like dreaming. Hate waking up and finding out-it's just s dream.
i like laughter. How i wish I could laugh all day.
i like having good conversation. Hate being with someone boring.
i like singing. Hate my twisted voice.
i like dancing. Hate body pains after.
i like eating. My body is too busy getting fats.
i like rain. It cleanses everything.
i like summer. Summer is fun though it triggers my asthma.
i like jokes. Have a good sense of humor.
i like rainbows. It never fails to cheer me up.
i like butterflies. I envy them.
i like puppies. They loved to be cuddled.
i like writing. It helps me with my emotions.
i like crying for no reasons at all. It makes my heart feel light.
i like pink. Next to purple and green.
i like being matured. Because it seldom happens.
i like reading. It always teaches something.
i like being in love. It makes the world go around.
i like being happy. It make the world brighter.
i like living life. And enjoys the twist and turns of it.
July 18, 2007
It's too early to think that it's never gonna be fine...
Today, I learned that nobody can limit my strength but myself. There are things that's hard, so hard that I only wish I can give it up right there and then. But there are times that as much as I want to give up and walk away, there's this strong will inside of me that doesn't want to just give up and walk away. A strong forced that keeps me holding on.... for I know that quitting isn't the right thing to do. ...for I don't want to be called a loser... a pathetic loser. ...for I don't want someone pity me. Perhaps it's this ego inside me that keeps me holding on. But whatever it is that keeps me holding on, I'm glad I didn't give up... for I know that everything will be alright in God's own time.
July 5, 2007
20 Things I learned Today
1. Money isn't made out of paper, it is made out of cotton.
2. The dot over the letter "i" is called a "tittle".
3. A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continously from the bottom of the glass to the top.
4. 40% of McDonald's profit come from the sales of Happy meals.
5. The "spot" on 7-up comes from it's inventor who had red eyes. He was albino.
6. Chocolates affects dog's heart and nervous system; a few ounces will kill a small sized dogs.
7. Most lipstick contains fish scales.
8. Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn't wear pants.
9. Ketchup was sold in 1830's as medicine.
10. Leonardo Da Vinci could write with one hand and draw with the other hand at the same time.
11. There is no clocks in Las Vegas gambling casinos.
12. The name Wendy was made up for the book Peter Pan, there was no recorded Wendy before.
13. 315 entries in Webster's 1996 dictionary were misspelled.
14. There are no words in the dictionary that rhyme with orange, purple and silver.
15. Leonardo Da Vinci invented Scissors. Also, it took him 10 years to paint Mona Lisa's lips.
16. A tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion will make it instantly go mad and sting itself to death.
17. By raising your legs slowly and lying on your back, you won't sink in quicksand.
18. The 1st product Motorola started to develop was a record player for cars. That time the most known player on the market was the Victrola, so they called themselves Motorola.
19. Chewing gum while peeling onion will keep you from crying.
20. Guinness Book of World Records holds the record for being the book most often stolen from Public Libraries.
2. The dot over the letter "i" is called a "tittle".
3. A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continously from the bottom of the glass to the top.
4. 40% of McDonald's profit come from the sales of Happy meals.
5. The "spot" on 7-up comes from it's inventor who had red eyes. He was albino.
6. Chocolates affects dog's heart and nervous system; a few ounces will kill a small sized dogs.
7. Most lipstick contains fish scales.
8. Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn't wear pants.
9. Ketchup was sold in 1830's as medicine.
10. Leonardo Da Vinci could write with one hand and draw with the other hand at the same time.
11. There is no clocks in Las Vegas gambling casinos.
12. The name Wendy was made up for the book Peter Pan, there was no recorded Wendy before.
13. 315 entries in Webster's 1996 dictionary were misspelled.
14. There are no words in the dictionary that rhyme with orange, purple and silver.
15. Leonardo Da Vinci invented Scissors. Also, it took him 10 years to paint Mona Lisa's lips.
16. A tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion will make it instantly go mad and sting itself to death.
17. By raising your legs slowly and lying on your back, you won't sink in quicksand.
18. The 1st product Motorola started to develop was a record player for cars. That time the most known player on the market was the Victrola, so they called themselves Motorola.
19. Chewing gum while peeling onion will keep you from crying.
20. Guinness Book of World Records holds the record for being the book most often stolen from Public Libraries.
May 30, 2007
Please listen to what I'm not saying ( A REFLECTIVE READING)
Don't be fooled by me.
Don't be fooled by the face I wear.
For I wear a mask, I wear a thousand masks.
Masks that I'm afraid to take off,
and none of them is me.
pretending is an art that's second nature with me.
But don't be fooled, for God's sake, don't be fool.
I gave you the impression that I'm secure,
that all is sunny and unruffled with me,
within as well as without;
that confidence is my name,
and coolness is my game;
that the weather's calm
and I'm in command,
and that I nedd no one.
But don't believe me.
Please.
My surface may seem smooth,
but my surface is my mask.
Beneath lies no smudgeness, no complacence.
Beneath dwells the real me in confusion,
in fear, in loneliness.
But I hide this,
I don't want anybody to know it.
I panic at the thought of my weakness
and frear of being exposed.
That's why I frantically create a mask
to hide my behind,
a nonchalant, sophisticated facade,
to help me pretend,
to shield me from the glance that knows.
But glance is precisely my salvation,
my only salvation.
And I know it.
That is, if it's followed by acceptance,
if it's followed by love.
It's the only thing that can liberate me from myself,
from my own self-built prison walls,
from the barriers that I so painstakingly erect.
It's the only thing that will assure me of what
i can't assure myself,
that I'm really worth something.
But I don't tell you this.
I don't care.
I'm afraid to.
I'm afraid your glance will not be followed
by acceptance and love.
I'm afgraid you'll think less of me,
that you'll laugh,
and your laugh will kill me.
I'm afraid that deep down I'm nothing,
that I'm just no good,
and that you'll see this and reject me.
So I play my game,
my desperate pretending game,
with a facade of assurance without,
and a trembling child within.
And so begins the parade of masks.
And my life becomes a front.
I idly chjatter to you in the suave tones
of surface talk.
I tell you everything that's really nothing
of what's crying within me.
So when I'm going through my routine,
don't be fooled by what I'm saying,
Please listen carefully and try to hear
what I'm not saying,
what I'd like to be able to say,
what for survival I need to say,
but which I can't say.
I dislike hiding. Honestly.
I dislike the superficial game I'm playing,
the superficial, phony game.
I'd really like to be genuine
and spontaneous and me.
BUT YOU'VE GOT TO HELP ME.
Don't be fooled by the face I wear.
For I wear a mask, I wear a thousand masks.
Masks that I'm afraid to take off,
and none of them is me.
pretending is an art that's second nature with me.
But don't be fooled, for God's sake, don't be fool.
I gave you the impression that I'm secure,
that all is sunny and unruffled with me,
within as well as without;
that confidence is my name,
and coolness is my game;
that the weather's calm
and I'm in command,
and that I nedd no one.
But don't believe me.
Please.
My surface may seem smooth,
but my surface is my mask.
Beneath lies no smudgeness, no complacence.
Beneath dwells the real me in confusion,
in fear, in loneliness.
But I hide this,
I don't want anybody to know it.
I panic at the thought of my weakness
and frear of being exposed.
That's why I frantically create a mask
to hide my behind,
a nonchalant, sophisticated facade,
to help me pretend,
to shield me from the glance that knows.
But glance is precisely my salvation,
my only salvation.
And I know it.
That is, if it's followed by acceptance,
if it's followed by love.
It's the only thing that can liberate me from myself,
from my own self-built prison walls,
from the barriers that I so painstakingly erect.
It's the only thing that will assure me of what
i can't assure myself,
that I'm really worth something.
But I don't tell you this.
I don't care.
I'm afraid to.
I'm afraid your glance will not be followed
by acceptance and love.
I'm afgraid you'll think less of me,
that you'll laugh,
and your laugh will kill me.
I'm afraid that deep down I'm nothing,
that I'm just no good,
and that you'll see this and reject me.
So I play my game,
my desperate pretending game,
with a facade of assurance without,
and a trembling child within.
And so begins the parade of masks.
And my life becomes a front.
I idly chjatter to you in the suave tones
of surface talk.
I tell you everything that's really nothing
of what's crying within me.
So when I'm going through my routine,
don't be fooled by what I'm saying,
Please listen carefully and try to hear
what I'm not saying,
what I'd like to be able to say,
what for survival I need to say,
but which I can't say.
I dislike hiding. Honestly.
I dislike the superficial game I'm playing,
the superficial, phony game.
I'd really like to be genuine
and spontaneous and me.
BUT YOU'VE GOT TO HELP ME.
May 28, 2007
on heartbreaks & heartaches
i just want to share this textmessages from my cousin, Alex-who is single again (according to his messages and to his friendster account) because partly it is true and maybe someone can relate to his sentiments. :-p just chill cuz!
" I got hurt so much that each time I see the person who gave me pain, I see a flashback of what happened in our past, every tear, every heartbreak that it gave me. And each time I do, all I could remember is how we really loved each other, too much that it didn't really work. It makes me realized that even if everything felt so perfect, it just only meant to teach me something..."
"I just wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned the hard way... some poems don't rhyme and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next."
" I got hurt so much that each time I see the person who gave me pain, I see a flashback of what happened in our past, every tear, every heartbreak that it gave me. And each time I do, all I could remember is how we really loved each other, too much that it didn't really work. It makes me realized that even if everything felt so perfect, it just only meant to teach me something..."
"I just wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned the hard way... some poems don't rhyme and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next."
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